9.19.19 1:17 am
I’m a Taurus so I can be a bit stubborn. Actually I don’t like to say stubborn, I prefer to say “firm in my beliefs” but whatever.
Anyway, I say all that to say that some people may interpret that as cold. Carless. Heartless. A bitch. Which couldn’t be further from the truth.
I’m actually a very caring, loving, concerned, etc. individual, but at the same time I don’t take any shit.
Again, saying this to say that I fall in and out of friendships. Not ‘cause I’m flaky, but because my “stubbornness” rubs some the wrong way. And I’m not a chaser. Never have been. If you wanna run Imma let you.
Not because I don’t care, but what’s the point? If you want to walk right out of my life I’m gonna let you. I’m not Monica, I’m not gonna write you a whole song begging you to reconsider and give me another chance.
I’ve had a few folks who walk out of my life leave then talk shit. It stings. Not particularly that they talk shit, but the fact that I know what I did for them.
Aside from being a stubborn, loving, firm, and caring person, I’m also a giver. I share a lot of my shit with people. Whether it’s time, money, my home, whatever, if you’re in need and I’m your friend I’ll either give you some of mine or help you find out how to get whatever you need. Ask any friend of mine (who hasn’t gotten pissed at me lmao).
Anyway, that’s what stings. Knowing how I tried to care for you and you just walked right out of my life and want to act like I did absolutely nothing for you. That shit stings.
Eventually most of those folks realize they miss me. Whether it’s my vibe, what I did for them, or they just realize they were being petty, 99% of the people who fall out with me end up coming back around.
From friends to lovers, they call themselves not fucking with me anymore, blocking me, unfollowing me, the whole nine. Then maybe weeks, months, and even years go by and suddenly I get a friend request or follow or a text or comment on Facebook from the person who supposedly “deaded” me.
And me being the chill Taurus I am I don’t make a scene. I’m cordial as shit.
And I think it stings for them.
I’ve learned that just because you don’t sweat stuff people do to you doesn’t mean you forget it all together.
I know how to handle you now. I have to keep you at a distance. Just cause I’m cool and not cussing you out or subbing you on social doesn’t mean we can ever go back to how we were.
We can’t. We won’t.
I forgive pretty easily but I’ll never forget. I can’t. It’s toxic to do so.
I say all this to say that while I don’t believe in holding grudges, people show you how you should treat them. And if we have a dramatic ass falling out/breakup or whatever, just know that you spoke your piece then, and I heard you loud and clear.
So I wish you the best, from a distance.